17 So if you consider me your partner, receive him as you would receive me. 18 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—to say nothing of your owing me even your own self. 20 Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ. -Philemon vs.17-20
Let's say you have a friend who gets addicted to some injurious drug like heroin. You care about your friend and want him off of it, and so you set out to help. Do you demand he quit cold turkey? Do you threaten him with calling law enforcement if he doesn't stop? Or do you offer to help care for him while he's going through withdrawals or drive him to the rehab clinic every day?
Or let's say your friend's marriage is on the rocks. She is inattentive as a wife and she has had a hard time seeing her husband as being worthy of her submission. Do you throw Ephesians 5 at her and demand she go against her feelings? Do you tell her she'll go to hell if she doesn't immediately become a champion of a wife? Or do you offer to watch the kids so the two can go out on a date and hash things out?
My point is, repentance is easier when there is someone to help with our anxieties. Many a man would repent, but does not out of fear that he will lose something or that it will be too costly. Many a woman shacks up with some man in a fornicating relationship, and though she knows it is wrong she is terrified of losing him. Many a man ends up a wreck after stealing or lying on the job, wanting to make amends but not spend time in jail or get fired. Our job as Christians who hate sin and love righteousness is to help others in their weakness - the same way Jesus helps us in our weakness.
St. Paul understands that Philemon's negligence in evangelizing Onesimus was economically motivated. Philemon knew in the back of his mind that converting Onesimus meant potentially having to free him and pay him a wage. Even if he stayed on board as a slave willingly, there is still time being taken to catechize him, let him attend Sunday services and prayer meetings, and a whole host of other Christian activities that cut into the crucial time for work that makes Philemon's life possible. So St. Paul addresses these fears and makes the offer: "I'll pay for everything."
May we have the same heart for our brothers and sisters in the Lord. Let us quit it with the melodramatic screech of "repent!" or relying on throwing nothing but guilt in our brothers' faces. Let us build up the Body in real and tangible ways my friends.
10/29/2026, 2 engagements


































